It is so easy to become complacent in college. Over the last two or three weeks, I've lived my life problem set to problem set. I spend most of my time either in the library or at my desk, and I don't have time for friends until the weekend. The excitement has faded out of the work, the challenge has been and must be met each week, and school has transformed into something resembling a job. And so I've been floating along with my head down and my hopes hidden. Those violent dreams that kept me up in August have retreated to somewhere in the back of my mind, and my focus has been on the present, the here, the now, the next assignment, the next test. I even stopped running for a two week span. And so I've been trudging along, content but not on fire.
Then two days ago, I decided to go for a run. It was absolutely terrible for the first two miles. My ankles ached, muscles rebelled, and I couldn't find my stride. And then, when my body realized that I wasn't stopping, things started to click. My gait evened out, my protesting limbs silenced, and my pandora station even got its act together. It was wonderful, so naturally I decided to lunge the length of my hall. The following day, I was more sore than I expected, but also so much happier and relaxed. The weather was dreary by the average person's standpoint, but I was loving its threatening clouds, oppressing humidity, and warm breeze. Blacksburg weather seemed to mirror my feeling that things are changing and that I need some wildness back in my life. So of course, summer child that I am, I celebrated the wild, wonderful weather by donning a skirt and letting my hair do its crazy rain-loving thing. I swirled throughout my day yesterday in a haze of daydreams and Econ, and ended my day with a run in the unseasonably warm rain.
This morning, I woke up with something closer to the fire I knew this summer. My drive is coming back, and its source is something as simple as getting outside and moving. In statics, my professor wrote an equation on the board and followed it by saying, "Don't worry about this unless you're ESM or Aerospace. The rest of you won't need as sound of a theoretical background." Two days ago, I would have been relieved to have one less thing to know. This morning, however, his comment really made me angry. Why shouldn't I learn that too? I even, for a fleeting second, contemplated switching to aero just so I could meet the challenge. After those fleeting seconds, I realized something. The fire's back.
Closing quote of the month:
Walk with the dreamers, the believers, the courageous, the cheerful, the planners, to doers, the successful people with their heads in the clouds and their feet on the ground. Let their spirit ignite a fire within you to leave this world better than when you found it.
-Wilfred A. Peterson
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